life safari

life safari - Thursday 5-28

2009-05-28T08:27:00.002-05:00

I am grateful to have had some very interesting and entertaining "happenings" in my life
I am also grateful to have had some very interesting and fun people in my life
I have had some experiences that other's have not had the opportunity to have
I have had some life shocks that are different than yours
all of these experiences and folks have had a profound effect on the way I view life and, my own life
there are some things I want to repeat and other things I hope I never have to go through again
My heart has rejoiced at times and been broken a time of two
I care too much about some things and don't care enough about some other things
but, mostly, I care too much when it comes to matters of the heart
I seem to have lived my life wanting to be older. When I was young, I wanted to be older so I could be out of my parents' home. Now, I want to be older so I can retire and (hopefully) travel
I say hopefully because, I wonder when I am able to retire, will I have money and health at the same time in order to travel
this concern is on the minds of all my friends who are my age. At least we have this same concern in common
I am grateful to be healthy. I am able get my socks on. I am able to get up and move about with few aching parts most mornings/evenings
any aches I have are put away with a good epson salt soak, Advil and a few hours on a heating pad
I don't lack for much of anything. I long for some things but my needs are met. Today I know the difference between needs and "wants"
I am grateful for the life that I have been living since 1997. It is a life in AA and people whom I love. AA led me to many other pleasing ways of life.
thank YOU

life safari - Thursday 05-09

2009-05-21T09:12:00.003-05:00

Well, here we are, another week almost over. Memorial Day on Monday. The 35 year anniversary of my mother's death this Saturday. Robert's wedding day in Mexico City. And, the sad realization that I most likely will not be able to get the morning shift - once again. I don't frankly believe that the one who CAN, is doing what he SHOULD for me in this matter - once again ! I am just re-visiting a place that keeps repeating itself in this work place. It is called CRONYism. Once again, the American (born and bred) takes it on the chin because-oh, forget it ! I could go on but the fact remains that...life isn't fair. No surprise.

I am, however, Grateful and Thankful...

that I have a job
for my Precious cat who is a source of joy and companionship that NO HUMAN can replace - she has her little "cat-ways" you all know what I mean
to be insured - so many of them aren't. Hopefully, that situation is going to change very soon
that, in so many ways and areas, I am a rich person. Wealthy beyond monetary verbage
that I will NOT let this situation with the job define my happiness (or not)
For Jill and the love I feel for her
for the fact that, I feel loved by her today
for the future plans of a trip back to Skyline Drive and the National Park with her later in the summer
for the freedom to look for another job at a relaxed pace. Who knows, something ideal for me may be closer than I know right now
that I am happy in my skin. Glad to be who I am and sad that the world can not seem to achieve PEACE
I am at peace today
thank YOU

life safari - May 19th

2009-05-19T10:00:00.002-05:00

Yes, dAAve, my new schedule WILL be a treat. However, it will cut out my noon meetings. I will miss you all but will see you at other times.

For some reason, I am not able to open your blog spot any longer ? I will need to research the reason and find out why.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be alive, well and in love with life
this cool weather
Precious
that I have more vacation time and need to plan what to do with it. I'll lose it if I don't take it - NOT !!
for weight loss and Weight Watchers
for AA and RECOVERY
to have people/critters I love and care about
to have a job and vacation time to take
too much to do a Gratitude List justice
Thank YOU

life safari

2009-05-14T09:21:00.003-05:00

Wow, haven't been here in months. I have been intent on following what is going on in Health Reform for many months when I'm on the computer. I had, and still have a major interest in this issue - as many of us do.

I am proud of the work our President is doing.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that I don't have to make the decisions (on that scale and level)
to be alive and healthy
for Precious and the joy and companionship she brings to my life
to be sober
to have lost some weight in the past months. I have, once again, grown weary of the process and so have perhaps gained a bit this week
for the probablity that I will switch to the morning shift - finally, at work. And, this time, it won't be 7am to 7pm. It will be 7 to 2 pm AND, no more late nights with Microsoft meetings !! yeah !
I am already thinking of how I will spend my afternoons free - many more possibilities for more stimulating activities in my life. Yes, I have worked hard for 3 years and now it is my time to reap some of the pleasures
that I have learned to worry less, not let silly peoples' actions disturb me and smile in the face of adversity - ah, life is better !
Alas, I do have a late night with MS tonight. Precious woke me up very early this morning for breakfast but, I have plenty of time to do all the things I want, as a consequence
for the fact that I have people I love in my life and they love me
thank YOU

life safari April 8th

2009-04-08T09:17:00.003-05:00

Wow, it has been ages since I've blogged.

I have been rushing through life, forgetting to smell the roses and too concerned about tomorrow to enjoy today.
my life is like a speeding, out of control train at times.

It is time to gear down, calm down and realize that life happens. It is a non-descriminating happening.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be alive and well, by all standards
I am Blessed beyond measure
I give myself permission to stay in the day and not worry about tomorrow - just for today
that I had a wonderful awakening to the birds, chattering their lovely talk this morning
It is a fine weather day in Houston ! Just right !
My Sponsor is traveling to San Diego for a week of fun and communion with friends there
I wish him a wonderful vacation
I work today
Precious is still my fantastic side-kick and we are just happy to have each other
And, I am happy to have YOU
for God's Grace and Mercy
thank YOU

life safari - Thursday

2009-03-05T08:18:00.003-06:00

One day closer to the end of this week !

And, it has been a very slow week. Sort of hum-drum but, it beats out of control exciting !

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

I am alive, well and loved

for more love in my life than I've ever been aware of
that I am sober, clean and smoke-free

to have plans for the weekend that are a bit different and that involves socializing with good friends and new

to be on a more level emotional plane than I was 3 weeks ago. All that new phone programing mess had me stirred up

to look forward to the noon meeting today and meeting a friend to look at his new life through his photos

for the Grace of God

for Precious and her company and love

that I have her to give love and stroking to. It is healing to love on one's pet

for friends and loved ones - my world is much more bearable and joyful because you are in it !

thank YOU and all You have Blessed me with

Peace

life safari - Sunday, March 1st

2009-03-01T10:57:00.004-06:00

I know Jill thinks I have absolutely lost my last marble. I wrote her an E-mail and started it by saying..."happy April the 1st." There may be no hope for my little pea brain.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

God, my higher power
a wonderful celebration of sobriety last night
that February is over and we are getting closer to warmer weather
for my friends and loved ones
for Precious. My house-mate
that I finally got music loaded into my new cell phone
that because I didn't give up, I can now enjoy my efforts of the above
I am happy that, when I want something, I persevere
for the Grace of God
to be sober, clean and smoke-free and,
the courage of one celebrant to talk about her quitting her anti-depressants. I have had pretty much the same experience she had. And, as she related, when I was on them - I defininately needed them. It is nice to be able to do with out and have a different life.

thank YOU

life safari - 02-27-09

2009-02-27T23:22:00.003-06:00

Well, February is almost over. We are having the March winds now, if they get stronger in March, it may blow our houses down.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that I am hanging on to less expectations

I am feeling more loved and related to by a romantic interest and it is helping me be content with just what we have. I am not desiring more and getting disappointed

I realize, with time and interacting that we are cut from different cloth

I desire a companionship with a person and she does not feel that desire. There are many other areas that we do not feel the same on. This, however does not cause me great anguish today as it did a few weeks ago.

Becoming better friends has been the difference in my feelings, mood and calmed my desire for something that she can not give.

It is a good thing !

Make not mistake, however. I am in love and love this person very much. Enough to be satisfied with what she has to offer and be self-contained and independent enough to seek what else I need elsewhere.

for Precious

for God's Grace

thank YOU

life safari - Thursday 02-26-09

2009-02-26T10:18:00.005-06:00

Another month drawing to an end.

Today, I am Grateful and thankful ...

for God's Grace, love and care - even though I'm sure I test His patience too
the love of my friends and family
for Precious in my home
for AA and recovery - for me and many people that I love
for friends/loved ones that are back in my life after I "took a powder"
for a new-found appreciation for love in a certain relationship that used to baffle me
for being much easier to be in a loving, nurturing relationship
I haven't cried myself to sleep over the above in several weeks
to be more light-hearted and less grasping/demanding for what I want out of the relationship
that, if I just be me and not try and cling, things change in a way that is so pleasing and fulfilling
I learn my lessons the hard way
thank YOU
and you all, too
God Bless

life safari - Monday

2009-02-23T09:26:00.003-06:00

I am feeling strange this morning. Got too hot in my sleep and got up very stuffed up. Also, I had an episode of eating more than I have been used to Saturday. My whole system is disrupted this morning.

Now, it is my goal to get back to a routine of normalcy today. I have been totally absorbed with programming my new phone. It is finished, for the most part and now it can be the aid that it is supposed to be rather than the object of my total attention.

I am so sorry that we have lost Jimmy L this past week. But, I know he is in a place better than he has been in for a long time. Rest in Peace Dear Jimmy. And, I hope your family will find peace soon and their grief will subside with time.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be alive and well this morning
that Precious is alive and well and by my side
that Jill is in my life
that Wanda Bear is in my life
that I have so many loving people in my life through AA
for God's Grace
for another day to live this life and I dedicate myself to living it as close to goodness and happiness as I can
although I have worries, I am going to live in a positive state of mind today
thank YOU

life safari - Feb. 19th

2009-02-19T09:54:00.004-06:00

Good Morning ! I feel rested and ready for the day.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am sober, clean, smoke-free and about 14 pounds lighter
Work is going well
Jill and I am doing well together (long distance, currently)
to have her back in my life
to also have Wanda Bear back in my life - I lost touch with Wanda and Jill for 3 years
for Precious - this wonderful cat is my touch-stone in many ways
for today and tomorrow and then, it's the weekend. No one owns any of my time on Sat. and Sun
for Grace
that, I finally got my contacts entered into the cell phone
for the challenge of technology - it's a hair-puller but once I figure it out, I feel good and enjoy the thing
for my friends and loved - ones
thank YOU

life safari - President's Day

2009-02-16T09:46:00.004-06:00

Happy President's Day to my Favorite passed President:
Bill Clinton. (and, Hillary) !!
Former President Bill Clinton IS, AND WILL ALWAYS BE...MY PRESIDENT !
He was my JFK.

And I don't care what anyone else thinks about it.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I got a smaller Cell phone. One that does all the things my 11 year old phone didn't do

that I had a wonderful weekend

that I am going to have a wonderful week

the fantastic spaghettini w/tomato and basil at The California Kitchen yesterday - Thank you so much Don K !

wonderful company and an absolutely stunning Sunday late afternoon (weather-wise)

to be alive, sober, anxious to be with frinds before work

thank YOU

life safari - Sunday 02-15-09

2009-02-15T11:17:00.005-06:00

My late mother's birthday is today.
I miss you.

I am Grateful and Thankful that..

I get to enjoy eating with two of my very Special men-friends in a little while !

I am fortunate to have people in my life who care about me, like me, love me and I feel the same for them - it just doesn't get any better than this !

And, Jill and I have had a series of talks, and, I am confident in our love for each other, our future of intimacy with one another, that our communication is open and honest and that,
she really DOES care deeply for me

And, she absolutely loves the manner in which I love her. And, I do.

I have made so many changes in the 3 years away from her. I worked at it. Not for her, I had no idea that I would ever talk to her again, hear from her or ever see her again.

I am well pleased that I made that call - I put fear aside and trusted her good heart. She is, indeed , a Good Hearted Woman. And, I am as well.

For God's Grace

a new awareness of what I do mean to Jill. We simply are from different cultures of being raised, backgrounds in Education and social traditions. I am all about emotion - she is all about thinking things to death. She's a very educated and smart woman. She has been in "Think Tanks". I have been in emotional brawls - perfect fit if you ask me !! TeeHee

To be sober, clean and smoke free STILL, AND,

to have lost 13.2 pounds in Weight Watcher's over 7 weeks thus far

to feel so alive and nurtured, wanted today

Thank YOU

life safari - Valentine's Day

2009-02-14T15:00:00.004-06:00

Happy Valentine's Day friends and family !

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I have a job
I am sober and clean
I have a car
a house
a sweet cat as a companion
friends that I would walk through fire for
friends who are family to me
the love I have in my life today
I never gave up and chose to persevere
good and horrible memories
happiness and sadness in unequal measure - I'm far happier than sad
God's Grace

life safari - tuesday 02-10-09

2009-02-10T08:30:00.003-06:00

To be Grateful and Thankful...

to be Blessed - all of my needs are met today. I do not want for anything that is needed to sustain my life. Also, I have much more that covers the "wants" category.

Life is Good

Thank YOU

life safari - o2-o9-o9

2009-02-09T10:23:00.003-06:00

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to Scott and his wonderful comments. Thank you, my friend. You always brighten my day with your words of Spiritual wisdom

to my Higher Power for giving me a wonderful cat to live with. She can brighten my mood just being her sweet, quiet, emeralded - eyed self

for my Sponsor who helped me by lisening and sharing and offering his sage reflections

for Father Tom and Frank for their company at dinner last evening. What a lucky woman I am to be in the company of men of love and Spiritualism

that I sent Father John a note of sorrow and support - his cancer is back

for the fellowship of AA

for the encouragement of Frank and Mary for me to return that D___ GPS unit (that I couldn't get to work right), And, I did and I got most of my money back !

that, had I not acted upon that suggestion yesterday, it would have been too late to return it

that I now can take suggestions

for plenty of interesting things to read at work today

for being alive today

for my friends and family

for the Grace of God

for Mercy

for sobriety

for talking and listening and sharing a laugh with frinds

for a job

that I am going to plan a vacation for myself - something that I really want to do. Someplace I really want to see

that the above scares the hell out of me - the actual DOING the deal

thank YOU

life safari - Saturday nite

2009-02-08T00:45:00.003-06:00

Boy, wounded in love. What a dreadful place for a heart to be. It's going to be ok though. I put myself in this position - me, I. No one else.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the friends and family I have at Lambda Center. You all make my heart whole again with your love.

Precious and my Higher Power - these two ask every moment of the day for my love and ask me, no, BEG me to allow them to love me. And I want someone who can not return the love I have for them ? How totally stupid ! What a waste ! I cry myself to sleep over this ? No more !

for a wonderful night at the Speaker Meeting. And then dinner with a friend. And laughs with this friend. How very special and appreciated.

for frank talk about ourselves at dinner. How very healing. This is the best way to sort things out-talking with a friend. Thank you, friend !

that I realize I need to get back to the Spiritual path I was on prior to Jill coming back into my life-or rather, my getting back into her life. She maintains her distance

By the Grace of God, she and my other friend that I had lost contact with for several years ARE in my life in some capacity. That is what I had prayed for. My prayers were answered and then I took the ball and went head-long into something of my own creation.

So, as I said to start. It is a situation of my own creation. I have no one else to blame for my hurt

I very quickly placed my Higher Power on the shelf and put someone in that esteemed place

Idol worship. Pure and simple.

God, help me get back to YOU.

The Grace of God which defies reason and worthiness

Thank YOU

life safari - thursday

2009-02-05T09:45:00.003-06:00

What a pretty morning in H-Town !

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful..

for the realization that I seek approval, happiness, answers, sense of self, many things, OUTSIDE OF MYSELF

I am not happy with this realization. However, I have had this going on for years. At least now, I am AWARE OF WHAT I'M DOING !

That, now I can do the work to change (above) YES!!!!!

to be willing to cut back on expenses - gas prices are steadily going up again

that I finally got the italics button OFF

Precious and her wonderful cat being

Dave's gift of the CAT LOVE LETTERS - what a joyful little read that was. Thanks Dave

the Grace I receive which I will never deserve

tests and results which can propel me to change my life-style

thank YOU

life safari Tues. 02/03/09

2009-02-03T10:32:00.003-06:00

Well, I had a very nice Birthday yesterday.
Thank you, every one of you who acknowledged my "special" day !

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be alive, sober and clean another day
that Precious is alive, well and with me
my computer is working very well now
that I didn't give up during all the computer troubles and run out and buy a new one
for friends. True ones. People that honestly care for me, about me and accept me for who and what I am
that Jill's mother is ok after her procedure
to have a home, a job, friends, a companion cat, to be alive another day, my health, I don't have to beg for help on the streets,
Wow, I Blessed with much more than I deserve
Thank YOU

life safari - Feb. 1st

2009-02-01T12:21:00.003-06:00

What a nice day. It is more to my liking (weather-wiz).

Tomorrow, I will be 59 (around 7:23 P.M.).
When my father came home from work on Feb. 2nd, my mother told him "Charley, it's time. Get me to the hospital." Dad was a welder at the time and he asked her if he could shower first. Mother told him "No !"

Dad went off to eat in the hospital cafeteria, and I was born ! I weighed 6 lbs. 9 1/2 ounces. I had a head of black hair and black eyes and I was Not happy !

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

a computer that is working correctly now. Didn't have to spend money on a new one

that I am thoroughly enjoying my relationships with Jill and Chick after I lost touch with them for a time. I thank them for their participation in reviving our friendships

to be sober and clean

for the joy of a friend picking me up and taking me to town - what a nice change ! Thank you Mary

for Precious and her loving, nurturing cat Spirit

for the house being clean today. Thank you Philip

for life itself - when I gripe about what is going on that I do not like, I am quick to think of things to be grateful for

AA and my "Gratitude List" friends and family. You all keep me sane and coming back. Thanks!

for the wonders of nature that I enjoy connecting with daily

for the fact that I was spared watching my parents age to the point that they were not able to care for themselves. My friend (the woman I love) is struggling with this issue with both parents

that I can be here (over the phone at least) for her and listen and express compassion

for God's Grace

that my side is not hurting as badly today. I could get up out of bed without as much effort or pain

that I am hopeful that as I finish the medication, my problem will disappear

Thank YOU

life safari 01-31-09

2009-01-31T13:43:00.003-06:00

The last day of this month.
And, AA birthday night.

Happy Birthday...
Zane 17
Diane 18
Kathy 18
George 13
Pat 17
________
WOW !!!!!!

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am sober too
to be in such great company much of the time
to have my house cleaned today
to be out of pain when I'm moving about. My pain is unbearable at night and early morning when I first get up. I'm under a Dr.'s care - I'll be alright
the weather today is so very beautiful
I'm Blessed with so much in my life
that my computer is operating correctly after not working right for so long
for second chances
that Mary is coming by my house to pick me up for dinner and AA birthday night - what a treat !
for the Grace of God
thank YOU

life safari - Thurs. 01/29/09

2009-01-29T10:22:00.003-06:00

What a beautiful day out !

My computer has seen fit to shape up - last night and today. It is acting like a new unit, responding like it is supposed to and doing it with speed and grace !

AWESOME !!!! Many of you know the problems I've had lately with it.

So, I was able to download software for my GPS unit. I had done so prior (or, so I thought) but,
the computer malfunctioned and it was never downloaded. Well,

I have a GPS unit that is so full of good stuff. It is connected to my computer, I have many things to enhance the experience at my finger-tips and, all because my computer decided to operate like it should last night. I'm stumped but, to show my appreciation, I have gone in and deleted a bunch of photos and other stuff that should help it maintain it's good attitude and service.

I am so Grateful and Thankful :

you know how happy I am for this pearl (above)
for God's Grace
for the "delete" button
that I learned the hard way years ago to only delete things I created on the computer
that I still hold the title of "Queen of delete"
that now, I will defrag and clean up the mess of my deletions while getting ready for my AA meeting today !!
Thank YOU

life safari - Wednesday the 28th of January

2009-01-28T09:33:00.004-06:00

Good morning. It is cold but at least we live in a more moderate area - we aren't having ice storms, snow piked on our roofs so that the roofs cave in.
I can not imagine life in areas like that. It must be very difficult.
My hats off to those who are hearty enough to carry-on living in it. I am too much of a softy.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

that I get another day of life

I slept - in this morning and, at least currently, I am not as depressed as I have been for a week
that in my past, I seemed to have been depressed as a normal way of life. Today it is a place that visits me on occasion. It is scary to me because I fear it may take permanent residence

my thoughts have been of "doom and gloom" for several weeks. Of course I'm depressed !

As a friend posted on his blog: "the thoughts I have today affect your life tomorrow." Loosely translated. It is so with me. I have very definately seen how, my emotions affect my body. And, my body's reactions are very immediate.

today, I have had many months of feeling great and very happy. I will not allow a week or two of saddness and depression to conquer me - I've come too far to turn back now !

I chose many months ago to go off of anti-depressants. I definately have had to deal through my emotions and come up with new ways of thinking and doing as a consequence.

If the day comes when I can no longer get myself through the depression as I've been able to do thus far, I will reassess my decision. I must say that I have worked very hard to make changes so that I could deal differently in life. Changes that have helped stave off being depressed.

that there is chemical help if needed

that although I have not been able to figure out this Geocaching set-up on my GPS receiver, I have taken a break and will hopefully come back to it tonight and "get it"

to know that, because my brain puts information together "differently" than some, it doesn't mean that I am stupid. I am a very detailed person on information. And my brain needs to be fed very detailed information. It looks like this: 1) do this, 2) do this 3) do this - no "daylight" for guessing what is done next for me. Other's can have some spaces in there that their brains can imagine what is done next. I see these as "nuances." My brain doesn't handle them when it comes to directions.

that I was able to vent here. I have needed to express what has been written but have had to get it all together in my own head to get it out.

God's Grace

the Mercy that I am given daily, hourly

for Precious who is so patient with me. I have tried to play ball with her more lately - she loves it

I love her

for love in my life

thank YOU

life safari 01-27-09

2009-01-27T07:56:00.003-06:00

Another day to attend to health check ups. It's good to almost be finished with them and I feel better because I have done them.

The "biggie" is Feb. 2nd - colonoscopy time. Yes, I'm going to talk about it. It's one of those things that is not fun, people hate to have done but it is soooo necessary. Collorectal cancer is very curable when caught early. I have a history (on both sides of my family) of pre-cancerous polyps. So, I get checked every couple of years.

Now, it's your turn.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am alive and well
even though my computer is failing, I'm perservering
can not get my GPS system fixed to use in Geocaching and I haven't given up yet
to be sober and clean
to have people who love me and whom I love
that it is going to get seriously cold later today and I am not staying home under the covers
that I have a job
a car
a Precious cat
Grace
so much more
thank YOU

life safari - Wednesday the 22nd

2009-01-22T08:49:00.003-06:00

Happy Birthday Trish !!!

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful ...

that I am alive and well this morning

to have friends

for Precious

for a new day

for health

for a job that supplies me a paycheck

a roof over my head

a car to get me where I wish to be

the promise of a new day and,

the Grace of God

for AA and Weight Watchers

for changes in my actions, thoughts and ways of behaving

for second and third and fourth chances (and beyond)

for God's Mercy

for art and my artist friends

for my intellectual and P.H.D. friends - who love the college drop-out anyway

for the peace I feel about myself and my place in the world today

for romantic love. Even when it isn't reciprocated quite as strongly

that I do not expect anyone to feel just as I feel

for this day of life and the desire to live it, love it and learn more

thank YOU

life safari 01-20-09

2009-01-20T07:26:00.003-06:00

What a historic day in America ! I wish I could curl up under the covers and stay home and watch it all today.

It is payday, that's exciting too. A bit less considering the new President gets sworn in today.

I am Grateful and Thankful that/for...

to be an American by birth and choice

I have been filling out health insurance forms the past three evenings and, I can tell you, it looks bleak. If you want health insurance, don't have any health issues ! My goodness, after three days of looking over my past 5 years (one wants past 10 years) of medical records, I should be on disability ! But, I have too many means to qualify there. It just puts me in a tough spot, psychologically

Today is a new day, I've given into the doom (last night) and today I will come out ready to fill out forms tonight - screw 'em !

Life is a real mixed bag of stuff. Now, I feel a sense of urgency about traveling. I feel that I had better get with it now while I'm physically sound (sort of) for, later, perhaps, not so much

What a juggling act life is

Today, I am perplexed by it all

that, I don't have to try and figure it out alone. I think I'll turn it over and have a pleasant day

And you?

for Precious and her company

for the people I love and that reciprocate that love

for God's Grace and Mercy

Thank YOU

life safari - Monday of Inauguration Week

2009-01-19T10:20:00.005-06:00

It is a party atmosphere in the country, especially in the District.
And, for good reason ! We as Americans have a new President and 4 years to work on things that have gone way wrong.

I am glad that there is a feeling of hope today in our Nation and most people. Some people are distraught at the change. To this I say, you've had your 8 years to the chagrine of others, now let us have these 4 years and try and not muddy the waters. Some real exciting things may just happen that will make you happy too.

I am Grateful and Thankful, today for...

Change
Change in me
Change in "the Guard"
Change in the Air
Change in _________. You fill in the blank.
Praise God and God Bless... our exiting President, our New President, our Nation and Peoples

Thank YOU

life safari - Saturday

2009-01-17T13:38:00.005-06:00

This carved tree is in the front entrance of the National Zoo, Washington D.C.

What a wonderful day I've had thus far. I went to an early meeting and then got a fantastic haircut. My hair stylist is very good. She has a huge client base and for very good reason. She's also a wonderful woman !

I plan to see a movie at 4:00 then attend a Speaker meeting tonight at Lambda. I am getting out and "doing" these days and it feels good.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

It was much warmer today. It is getting overcast and may rain tomorrow

I feel full. I feel satisfied being me for the first time in my life. It is as though, all those loose ends that I could not bring together have fallen into place

I really like and appreciate my new hair cut

I cherish my friends, family and cat

being in a place of acceptance and freedom from the oppression of doubt and fear

for the feelings I have for other's who are in pain. I pray for other people. I have had miracles worked in my life so I know that prayers work. I feel so good that, today I care for other's

the feelings of not being in chains to my selfish desires any longer

that I have this Precious cat in my life and a wonderful friend in Rosie, my hair dresser's Golden Retriever

the love of some outstanding people and to be able to honestly reciprocate with my love

I have an awesome life today

the Grace of God

Thank YOU

life safari 01-16-09

2009-01-16T09:57:00.005-06:00

What a beautiful, however, very cold morning !

this summer, no doubt I will miss this weather. How soon I forget the opressive heat and humidity ! even as I don't care for cold weather

I have had a wonderful week. Hearing from two friends that shared lots of years and "stuff" with me - much of it while still drinking -because of this, I have been able to shed that deep sense of sadness and loss I have been carrying. I have everything to be happy, joyous and free (spirited) about.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...
Grace and Mercy given to me. I will be ever so humble and remember how that moment feels.
this, will aid me in extending the same Grace and Mercy to others

for the gifts of friendship and love - I may not have realized what it takes to "love" before this week but, I guarantee you, I definately know now. Better late than never !

that I have been working toward this change for 11 years through AA and recently, on a Spiritual level. It took getting involved on a religious basis for me to grasp that Spiritual level.

That the AA program is not a "one size fits all" - we all have a different path to the same ending:
stay sober and clean, try and make reforms with the guidelines, have a sense of conscience
awareness and be brave = a sober, clean better life.

for the simplicity of AA that I made so difficult for so long because I was just not able to put it all together at the same time.

the awareness that it was not ME who finally got me where I am internally today - it took a couple of villages for me

and the knowledge that there is more to do now

gratitude that I feel more equipted to go forward from here

Precious. One of many gifts my Lord has Graced me with

The Blessing of happiness today - Friends (all of yous) to walk through my jouney in life with me

Thank YOU

life safari -Thurs. 01-15-09

2009-01-15T09:56:00.003-06:00

Oh, Good Morning, all !

I am very happy to say that, I did hear from one of my friends which I had lost contact with. What a joyful experience ! I am please that she seemed as happy to hear my voice as I was to hear hers. Thank absolutely made my day.

I will just pick up and begin corresponding with my other friend that I lost contact with the past year. I did talk to her by phone and she told me that we are still, as always friends in her mind and that the miles between us have simply seperated us. I will not allow that to be from now on. I intend to correspond with her again on a regular basis. I miss her terribly !
But, there is a solution. All I have to do is get off my A_ _ and stay in touch.

Today, I am Blessed and truly Grateful and Thankful...

for life - another day to make my life in this world count for something good and genuine
for God's Grace
for Precious
that joy has replaced that pain and sadness that I felt at the beginning of the week (and beyond)
for getting done what I said I would do this year- a good physical check-up. My first appt. is this morning toward that end
for the gorgeous blue, clear skies lately. What a beautiful string of days we have had of late
for the cheerfulness I feel and..
the joy of life I am experiencing.
The Lord has Blessed my life and I have begun to let go and let God
and, it works !
Thank YOU

life safari - Sunday - 01/11/09

2009-01-11T12:16:00.003-06:00

Yes, dAAve, right you are.
It's just talk.
However, I am in need of a vacation - desperately !

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that I can turn a switch and get heat and cool in the house - what luxury I am Blessed to enjoy
I am sleeping indoors - I'm not out in the elements and prey for wild animals
I am fortunate to have a few friends - I haven't run them ALL OFF -yet
for the remorse and guilt for the ones I apparently have run off - I miss them
I have gotten in touch with two of the above - my efforts of reconciliation are ignored thus far
that the two above are really BIG losses
that although I buried the memory of these two losses for a time, I believe it has weighed heavily on my inner feelings of discomfort/saddness
perhaps I just need a vacation from myself
I can just imagine how Precious must feel. Perhaps she would enjoy some time to love me from afar (?)
Well, since she is unable to talk, I will never know. Although the two can talk, they choose to be silent
I will never shut the door on anyone again

life safari 01-09-09

2009-01-09T21:56:00.003-06:00

Well, this evening, I had an "Update" on my Norton software and - my computer is operating better than it has for weeks ! ABOUT TIME !!!! I was so close to throwing the thing out in the yard - so many times the past few weeks. Now, this is what I'm talk'n about.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that it is the WEEKEND (finally)
that I lost a bit more weight this past week
a friend of mine has lost quite a bit of weight in past weeks -his medical picture is looking better
that we had mild temperatures today BUT, we're in for a drastic change REAL soon (in the morning) BOO !
I may enjoy sitting in front of the fireplace with Precious this weekend. She enjoys the fireplace as much as I
that I don't live an apartment or townhouse - fires seem to strike these often
it seems that my leak in my bathroom is repaired. I now have a lot more closet space available
that I have never seen the criminal's faces who murdered a person as I am hearing a man on the news explain (he is moving and not showing his face on the news)He was also shot at
that if it gets much more dangerous in Houston and my neighborhood, I will sell out and move
part of me wants very much to move - Africa perhaps ? I could see myself living and working in the bush. This is a new thing for me. To allow myself to even dream of what I wanted very strongly a few years ago.
I think I'll keep that thought open to possibility and prayer
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 01-08-09

2009-01-08T10:30:00.003-06:00

I feel wonderful this morning ! It is going to warm up later today, that makes me very happy.

The low 70's are the best temperatures.

It is Thursday, almost the weekend. I treasure the weekends, I can putz about with no time limitations and enjoy staying up until I decide to go to sleep.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I had a wonderful morning prayer and devotion time this day
now I feel ready for the challenges of the world
perhaps today I will be able to put together meekness, humility and brotherly love in all my minutes of life - in every situation
especially in traffic !
I'm ready, willing and I feel able
Precious. We had a nice "us time" this morning before getting up
the sunshine and warmer temperatures
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 01-07-09

2009-01-07T11:05:00.002-06:00

Have enjoyed a nice leisurely morning for a change. no rushing around to get breakfast, shower and downtown. of course, I have had feelings of shame, doubt and selfishness around this decision. Only because I have not stayed home like this for a while.

I devoted most of the morning to devotions, reading and prayer. Something I give short-thrift too often any more. But, had I gotten up earlier, I could have done it all and still gone downtown.

I was a bit tired this morning when I first woke up so, that is why my decision to lounge longer.

I'll forgive myself. Perhaps tomorrow I'll feel like awaking earlier. And, perhaps it will be warmer tomorrow.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for God's Grace -it's not earned. It is given. There is nothing I can do to "earn" it (although, I still try)

for Precious and her sweet cat-personality and her love toward me. She is a delight in my life

that I must end this desire to "take care of" other's in my life. I need to take care of me and not give away so much to where I don't have for myself down the line. This issue has been causing me great internal struggle for awhile.

for the bagel and cream cheese I just ate. Now I feel better able to do more moving around

I now feel the walls of the house closing in on me and must get my day started.

I have a birthday card to get and send, better get on it.

to be alive and well today. I also have a desire to stay this way so have made a commitment to have a complete physical. Should have called and made appointments today. I still can and will after my shower.

that writing and talking to other's helps me get things worked out in my mind and also, getting things done.

that I have company in friends and loved ones-I am not alone

Thank YOU

life safari 1-4-09

2009-01-04T13:26:00.006-06:00

This is my Sponsor's favorite poem.

So beautiful ! He read it to me this morning and I had to get a copy of it for myself.

Thought I'd share it.

That cold front is moving in here - drat ! I was enjoying the tropical air. But,

I am Grateful and Thankful...

I had success with not getting upset in traffic yesterday

I walked a little ways today. Little but, a start

I made a couple of calls today to people whom I love and have not talked to lately

I, I, I, I, what is wrong with this picture !

AA meetings, work and church are high on my list of "to do's" with regularity

my eating is under control and that includes when I eat out at restaurants - that's BIG !

for my precious cat

that I am going to begin traveling this year. I have stayed home because of my cat. She didn't do well the only time I boarded her for a trip. I am going to find a good place or have someone come to the house and...

I'm going to travel this year. A REAL vacation.

I will pray for Precious' safety and health while I am gone and turn it over to the Lord and accept that whatever happens is as things are supposed to be

I am excited about making changes in my life this year. I am going to be sooooo present in my own life in 2009 !

And, present in YOUR lives in 2009, so there !

I love you all

Thank YOU Lord

life safari 01-03-09

2009-01-03T16:03:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year !!!!!

I had a delightful end to 2008 with friends and loved ones and an inspired beginning of 2009 with friends and loved ones. So, I have been nurtured from both years. I'd say that is the best of all endings and beginnings. Thank you all who made me know that I am loved and pertinent in your lives.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for joining Weight Watchers (again)
for some modest loss of weight but more importantly, I am not stuffing food into my mouth with impunity
for friends and loved ones
for Precious
for AA and the meetings that I have been attending
for St. Anne Catholic Church and the Masses and Priests there
that I am trying to change some things that cause me to become very upset and rant and rave
that my neighbor's across the street got their lost parrot back. I prayed for them to find that bird when it got out. It was found in Sugar Land. It landed on a man's head and would not budge until he got it food and water. One of the girls went on-line and the person contacted them that he had the parrot - I am so happy for them !
that the above was a wonderful surprise after all these days and cold weather after the parrot got out. We all were concerned the worst would happen and alas, the best happened !
that it has taught me to never give up
that seeing a car spinning out of control on 59 this morning showed me how easy things happen with speed and carelessness. Thank God it all turned out without anyone being hit by the car. The woman driving fought the spin and gained control. Also, those who saw it happen slowed down. The best thing - hardly anyone on the road at the time.
I am going to slow down and learn to not get upset in traffic
that is what gets me ranting and raving.
that I can change my behavior if I will apply myself and use what I know to end this madness
the knowledge that I can only control my behavior and what I think about other's behavior
I can only control my car and what I do with it
Thank YOU

life safari 12-29-08

2008-12-29T09:04:00.002-06:00

HUG YOUR PET !

Oh my gosh, Mike M. call me !!!!! I must pay extra for texting and don't know your cell Number-please call me !!

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

My former boss, Mike M commented and perhaps we'll connect via phone SOON !!! He put up with alot of my sassiness. He's a good Man !! Call me

people who love me in spite of my character defects (as above)

people come back into our lives after time apart - for instance-Mike and Mary

God's Grace

Precious and her wonderful companionship

I am so pleased with the holidays this year. It was calm, serene, loving and full of good will and good cheer

my friend Mary accompanying me to Libert, TX yesterday to visit Miss Beulah's grave

that, because I am sober and clean I have friends today. Thanks to AA, I have made changes over the years and have become a better person. Now with my HIgher Power in my life too, I am making even more progress to become a better person

the journey. the life safari. the company on my life safari - thank you all !

Trish is getting out and seems to be getting over her grief from her losses of late. Big losses and one after the other. God Bless !

Nagar and her new friendship. What a wonderful young woman, wife and mother

to be alive and well. In a fellowship of friends and family

Thank YOU

life safari 12-24-08

2008-12-24T12:31:00.002-06:00

Christmas Eve. Merry Christmas everybody !!

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am sober, clean and smoke-free another day
that I have awesome friends/loved ones
Scott, what a beautiful sentiment - if Trish reads that Blog, she will be so appreciative of your sending Chester to round up Lucie and escort her to the Rainbow Bridge - such a sweet, sweet man !
that although I would rather not work, I am so Blessed to have a job !
some of the new and devastating sadness of losing Lucie is easing for Trish - Thank YOU, Lord
for Precious. She is my "special" gift of love from God
God's Grace and salvation
thank YOU

life safari 12-21-08

2008-12-21T10:40:00.002-06:00

Sunday-I slept fitfully last night. This morning, I woke up knowing the sadness of death. The loss of Lucie and what it must feel like for Trish this morning.
I desperately want to help her carry the burden of a heavy heart.
The joy of Lucie's life is what we all want to think of and remember. And, remember we will. But, there is the emptiness of her space in the room. We'll remember that as well and, we will feel the normal sadness it creates.

As always, the daily happenings of what I see around me with other animals, the ones whose lives were not spared - my reaction is to hug Precious and hold her especially close and rub her ears longer, talk to her and assure her of how much I love her and fee Blessed to have her in my life ! And, I am Blessed.
She does her best to nurture me too. She gets on my chest and kneads the fat under my chin. That spot belongs to her.
I just watched her root under a towel in the chair piled with clean clothes. That's what cats do.
I just love her little cat - self. Her cat wisdom and love.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for the blessing of Precious in my life !
Thank YOU

life safari 12-20-08

2008-12-20T23:23:00.003-06:00

December 20, 2008.

Lucie Herrera has expired.

She was lovingly and peacefully put to sleep after living a great life with Trish and Rosie.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to have known this precious Golden Retriever for some years

that I was in the position to bid her a loving farewell today prior to her peaceful death

I was not aware today would be her day to be called away

I feel that she was ready, however. She looked tired. She put up such a galant fight !

Kidney disease was her demise

She was well loved and well tended to

humans wish to be treated with as much love and respect

I will keep Lucie, Trish and Rosie in my prayers. Precious will too.

We'll see you again, Lucie. Every time a pet is loved beyond measure, you'll be there.

God speed and God Bless. I'll miss your little mug

I'm going to hug Precious real close. Really, really, closely.

life safari 12-19-08

2008-12-19T11:52:00.002-06:00

Well, what a surprise (very pleasant) to think that today was Thursday and find out that it is actually - FRIDAY !!!!! And, payday !!!!!

I am Grateful and Thankful for...
getting back to my prayers and devotions this morning
for fun that costs no $$$$ - FACEBOOK and BLOG
for friends that are part of my family. MY personal FAMILY
that Sunday will be the day my leak is fixed (after two dry runs)
for Precious and her love and catness
for my home
that I was given special Christmas gifts from very nice customers
one very generous
oh, and a bit of a bonus from Ampco - thank you so much. It was very sweet and thoughtful
for this day and the fact that I am alive and well and able to count my Blessings today
for my sobriety
that I am clean
I do not smoke any more and haven't for some time now
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 12-17-08

2008-12-17T10:07:00.003-06:00

Oh, I really like this photo. I took it at Brazos Bend State Park. I was hanging out there alot at the time of this photo. I camped there almost every weekend. Tent camped - hard on the back but, oh so much fun ! My favorite time was eevening around a huge campfire. I would sit in front of the fire for hours. A picture on Scott's Blog this morning reminded me of this period in my life.

It is a period of a younger me. The last time I camped out I could barely get up from the bedroll, it took forever to get the kinks out of my back to walk. I rather hated the cold shower in winter and hot shower in summer which is standard issue in a campground. So, for now, I treasure the good times. The earlier times. I fancy having a pop-up camper one day. When I am retired and after I've toured parts of the over-seas lands I wish to visit - I will pull a pop-up and see the U.S. of A. Base out of home and travel. That's my dream anyway.

Today, I am Grateful and Very Thankful for/that...

I got back to some prayer and devotions after too long away
that Precious and I are well and together another day
for my friends and loved ones whom I love and respect
that I pray for those that I love. I pray for Blessings and safety. Health and happiness.
I am alive. I'm sober, clean and smoke-free
although my computer is challenging me with it's operating glitches, it is functioning enough to do what I desire(knock wood it continues)
for wonderful memories of things I have done in my life, people whom I have known, and the love I have received
My hope is that, through the crazy periods of my life, some of the love I intended to give other's came through the cloud of my misguided actions, fears, illness
for the people in my life today
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 12-16-08

2008-12-16T12:30:00.002-06:00

Good morning. Went to the Podiatrist. Had the toe taken care of - pretty much a painless procedure these days. I was well pleased. I went ahead and had the ends of the toenail taken out - roots killed. It assures there will be no more ingrown toe nail on that toe.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to have a warm enough coat for this frigid weather
that I was reminded just now that I am trying to run this dog and pony shoe - I need to Let Go and Let God run it.
for the warmth of being in the house
that Precious is warm and safe with me
that I have friends and family that I love and they love me
to have a job right now. Times are really getting tough
for now, the family's business is holding. It had not occured to me but, if the auto industry fails, their company may fail as well. They buy many, many truck chassises from auto industry
my health
my computer is still acting up. I may throw it out in the yard before it is over
for the Christmas season and what it stands for. Merry Christmas everybody !!!
I want to remember that it is about LOVE, PEACE and GIVING -not getting
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 12-15-08

2008-12-15T11:56:00.002-06:00

Wow, only 10 more days until Christmas.

It is again, cold and miserable for me in Houston. I like the cold but my skin does not. I was in pain all weekend because of the splits in my finger tips from our last cold weather.

The neighbor's parrot from across the street is out -loose. It's a shame. Chastity looked all around the trees in the neighborhood yesterday.

I opened a Face Book page and got it set up and working but I am having a real problem with the spot.
I keep getting my work on the page interupted with a message that I have a wrong adress for the spot. It makes no sense. I am in the spot. Have a page. I go to the page and keep getting interupted with this stupid message. I have followed their message suggestions regarding how to fix this interuption - not once but several times. I am receiving it still. It makes it impossible to work on my page. It's certainly no fun at all. I do not know what else to do except drop the page.
I contacted Peoplepc but they tell me to contact Facebook. I do not know how to contact them.

I am about fed up with this mess.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be sober, clean and smoke-free
I have an appt. with a Podiatrist tomorrow to fix my ingrown toe nail
to be alive but I wish my fingers and toe were not ill
I am thankful that my other programs on the computer are not messed up like the FACEBOOK thing
for any advice for the problem I am having with facebook
I'm a bit down about the facebook problem. I enjoyed setting it up but now it's no fun to try and use it because of the persistant problem
that I am now, not in a very good mood. I am Grateful that I can say how I am feeling
thank YOU

life safari 12-12-08

2008-12-12T11:20:00.002-06:00

I love the number 12. 12 is my favorite number. It is large, even and pleasing to my eye and ear.
twelve. 12.

Today, I am feeling rested after a very long evening at work. I had to stay for a party that one of our clients had. Precious got fed very late again. I am thankful that she is sooo forgiving.

Friday. Thank goodness.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

last day of work for the week
the warmer weather
that so much information is available through the Internet - the world is at our finger tips
to not be a union worker for the auto makers. How silly the union voted not to take a decrease in pay. 100% of nothing is nothing - hello !!
to be invited again this year to Christmas dinner with my family
to be employed
that I have food to eat
for my friends and loved ones - my life is rich because of you all !
for a good, warm coat and pair of gloves
Precious and her little smiley face. She always has a smile
she missed her landing when she jumped from the bedside table onto the bed this morning. It is amazing to watch a cat who is embarrassed
that I am happy, joyous and free this morning
to be sober, clean and smoke-free today
for life itself
thank YOU

life safari 12-11-08

2008-12-11T08:11:00.002-06:00

It snowed in Houston last night !! I just love snow. I wouldn't want to live where I had to shovel it to move around, however.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am shopping for a real coat in a few minutes - I nearly froze at work yesterday
that Precious forgave me for being so late to get home and feed her - what a love she is
that God has Blessed me with so many loving and generous humans and animals in my life
for the Grace and salvation I feel this morning
for stores with heavy coats, gloves and ear muffs - I'm supposed to work late tonight
for my friends and loved ones. I love and appreciate you all. More than words will ever express
to be sober, clean and smoke-free another day
awesome !
for snow last night
that I am me and you all are who you are
thank you for sharing your lives with me
thank God for LOVE
Peace and Love

life safari 12-10-08

2008-12-10T09:17:00.002-06:00

What a cold and rainy morning. It is good to be out of summer weather AGAIN. However, this is Houston and we may be revisited by our 70 degree temps at any time.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the love and constancy of true friends of mine
that I have had the opportunity to examine and change some ways/beliefs that were not serving my best interests
I am stubborn but, because of the recent changes (brought on by a friend and a Sponsor), I will be less resistant to change in the future - some things are just not black/white
to accept myself as I am today, right now, this minute - I am ok with me
thank YOU, God for my friends and loved ones that, they are ok as they are right now - this minute
that I have the mornings to do as I wish
that I wish to be with my friends at Lambda today at noon
for Precious in my life
for the amazing stories of extraordinary animals in the news lately - awesome !
for God's Grace, Acceptance and Patience

life safari 12-8-08

2008-12-08T10:38:00.002-06:00

Monday - warm weather today.

I had a good weekend. I hope you all did as well.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am alive and in the world today
Precious is alive and well and with me
to be going to celebrate the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary today
If I do not get off this computer, however, I will not get there
I love eveybody - you know who you are - and hope your day is joyful and peaceful
I actually am happy for the warmer weather
to be sober, clean and smoke-free another day
God's Grace and Love
thank YOU

life safari - addendum

2008-12-06T10:41:00.002-06:00

I forgot. The reason for the Nature vs. Nurture article was to say...

The Lion and the Lamb have already lay down together. When will we (people) drop the rock?

Peace and great love now - all of us.

life safari 12-06-08

2008-12-06T09:31:00.003-06:00

I ran this clipping some time ago but, it bears a fresh look.
This lioness in the article has "adopted" several oryx. It was such a shock that some of the well-known wildlife photographers/conservationists who live and work in Africa had to go to Samburu to see her in action themselves. It is an amazing occurance. There have been no new updates for a number of years now.

What a beautiful day in Houston. I am happy to be alive. To call my time my own for two days and nights.

I am most Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I have been seeking a better understanding of how I want to be as a Child of God
as a "seeker" I have been reading about those things that have caused consternation for me in relation to being 1) Catholic 2) religion 3) faith 4) church 5) Bible/Scripture
after putting my fingers in my ears for months, I have been listening to what other's have to offer on these subjects (people who are important in my life)
for reading The Shack by William P. Young
Also, The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kid
these books and other reading I do has helped me realize that:
I have been in a place of great hurt and saddness for a very long time - it has shaded my beliefs of all 5 things above
I say I want to be a Christian but, Jesus was not a Christian - he was a Jew (I'm not knocking it)
so, to try and follow Jesus' teachings (The Beatitudes), is not striving to be a good Christian. It would be striving just to be a good person
In the book (The Shack), there is a reference to the TRINITY OF TERRORS: religion, economics, politics
When my friends tried to tell me the same things found in this book - I would have none of it !

What I am trying to say is...
unfortunately, I have had tunnel vision regarding what I believe and would hear no one who tried to explain what they had discovered about these topics
I wanted so much to find a "fix" for myself. Prescibed by someone else so I could sit and coast - not think, not work, not question, not be responsible
I am Grateful that I finally took my fingers out of my ears
I had so many that tried to drop hints to me about things. Words such as "these issues shouldn't be made to be political" - ah, yes, I see now
Gays - we are being "politicized" - I ask..."what would Jesus do?"
I do not think it is what the TRINITY OF TERRORS is doing

All I am saying is this,

I am a proud gay woman who loves to pray and worship in the Catholic church. I will continue to be Catholic. It is a beautiful religion. The Bible is a history book. It has been translated so many times in so many languages that it is common knowledge that mistakes have been made and things have been changed to suit "others" agendas.
I do also adhere to the Doctrines. The Nicene and Apostles Creeds state what we as Catholics believe. Some of the other stuff - no. And, it is not required.

I, in good conscience and with a clear understanding, tell you that I am not going to operate out of a wounded Spirit one more day !

I was aided in RCIA by a woman who has studied and taught and has a Masters Degree in religion. She tried to get me to see what I have finally come to after all these months. God Bless you, Rose !

I would not change where I have been, what I have done for the past few months.

It has gotten me to this place of comfort and better understanding

I am Grateful and Thankful to be free to be myself without my Great Saddness that I have carried since I was 5 years old. And, over the years I have stacked on more and more saddness to the pile.

Thankful and Grateful to AA and loved ones. To have had AA friends and family waiting in the wings of love for me to come to a place of change and love, humility, charity and meekness.
Thank YOU
thank you Precious
Praise God

life safari 12-4-08

2008-12-04T10:17:00.000-06:00

Well, it's cold again, after summer weather yesterday. Only in Houston !
The static electricity is one thing I detest about the cold weather. Also the fact that the skin around my fingernails cracks and breaks.

Happy Thursday, everybody. I have been looking forward to a couple of PBS programs that run tonight. So, I will be happy to finally get to watch them.

Thanks dAAve and Scott regarding the file of passwords. I have a drawer with that info. on it for each thing I use. I just forget to look at the one for my E-mail when the service is interupted. Also, I didn't realize until the other day that "Webmail" is a different password from the E-mail one. Oh, life is complicated ! I think I have it now and will be better prepared from now on.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the rain and wind as the cold front moved in last evening
for heat that comes on with the press of a button
that I am blessed with a wonderful cat companion
tomorrow is Friday AND payday !
for much and varied reading material that I enjoy at work every day
that I feel much better about my life situation in regards to my faith, sexuality, religion, beliefs, habits and life in general. I have put myself under a real strain and burden regarding how I felt I "should" be and feel for quite some time
to be free today of the huge question marks and judgements of myself about the above comment
that I accept myself just as I am today - right now. I can not say that I did so for the past several month. I tell you, I feel free today
Free to be who and what I am - and, today I am a proud lesbian, a proud Catholic, a proud woman in recovery from booze and drugs, a proud mother of a wonderful feline, a proud friend and sister to many great friends/family from Lambda Center !
I am proudly going to Mass today at noon and I am not concerned that I could be excommunicated for being gay/bi/whatever the hell I am
I strive to fulfill the principles and characteristics of THE BEATITUDES as given in the Serman on the Mount
I am a child of God and I am a product of a loving God
This is what I know and believe today and that's my story and I am fine in my conscience with it all. We are, after all - SOULS
I do not believe that SOULS have gender identification. We just are
I JUST AM
and today, I am happy with me and love my friends/family
I came to realize last weekend that I have been cutting myself off from the very thing that makes me a good human being - other human beings
I am thrilled to say that, I have taken steps to correct this situation
Praise God
God's Grace and the Grace of loving friends/family
thank YOU

life safari -Tuesday 12/2/08

2008-12-02T08:08:00.000-06:00

This cold weather really makes me feel frisky !!! How about you?

life safari 12-2-08

2008-12-02T06:33:00.002-06:00

This is the day of Jack's cancer scan - I pray that it will be clear. Jack almost died from his radiation treatments. He's been in remission. This is an important day for him.

I just have to share with you an article online in the news that affected me. The article was titled:

"Deer gets revenge after hunter shoots him"

Now, I am not advocating that all hunting is a terrible thing. I do, however, think that many "hunters" have unfair advantage over their prey and kill. It just does my heart good to know that, once in awhile, the animals get to exact a measure of come-up'ance while they are being - well, killed.

It seems the deer was shot, went down and looked very dead. However, the deer was not dead, jumped up and poked his beautiful rack into the hunter's head and ran off. Unfortunately and predictably so, the hunter pursued his victim but the deer required two more shots to the body to kill it. Now, I call that 1) a shame and 2) a breath of fresh air for the hunted
Wow, these "canned hunts" on big cats could use some news like this. Perhaps hunting would get back to a level playing field for all hunted animals (?) Naw, probably not. Shame.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

it is another cold morning. What a nice change from our very HOT summer
for advance notice for a very late M/S meeting tonight
I am sorely aware that my sedentary lifestyle and over-eating is adversely affecting my health
awareness is great but, I have got to act on this issue before I pass the damage done - too late mark
that Lucie has hung in there with all her health issues like a champ ! This very sweet Golden Retriever has fought for her life and her owner/mother, Trish and many friends have been willing this little Spirit dog to rally for as long as she can with out suffering - I'm thinking about you today, Lucie
I'm tremendously Grateful for my sweet Precious
to hear the birds fussing outside my window
my Internet is up and running again. Seems I get confused and can not remember all my passwords - for all my different programs
my memory is beginning to fail me more and more often
God's mercy and Grace
thank YOU

life safari - 12/1/08

2008-12-01T11:13:00.006-06:00

I just really like this ! I don't think a Penquin can outrun a Polar Bear but, he may be able to outrun his fellow Penquin.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

a good night's sleep

the cold weather today

I finally got some cleaning in the house done. More to do, however

for the time of Devotion and Prayer this morning

I exercised those habits I had put aside and returned to a place of comfort once again regarding my Faith

Precious and her company and wonderful loving ways. We have a developed routine of habits that demonstrate our love for one another

to be alive today

I am thinking of Jack and praying for a clean cancer scan tomorrow

for the decision to get a plumber out here and address these "house issues" and get on with it

for a job. One I love is without as of today - Hang in there, another will come to you

for my health which is enhanced by being sober, clean, smoke-free and God's Grace

thank YOU

life safari - Nov. 30th 2008

2008-11-30T10:16:00.000-06:00

The last day of November, wow, 2008 is rolling out. I just love this picture. There is another I will use next time - just makes me chuckle.

It is a beautiful day. A bit nippy but gorgeous.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

Never have I been in a close situation with violence involving guns and death (or has any member of my family)
that the day is warming up very nicely
to have enjoyed myself last night at a friend's - have not done one on one socializing in quite some time

that I am determined and prepared to see if I still have a water leak (other than the obvious one) in my bathroom. I have just not used that room because it was such a hassle trying to get any definitive answer - short of tearing out all the sheet rock - we'll see
Because of the above, I have had much less closet space for storage - so things got strewn out around the house
although this leaking thing is a cause of anxiety, I want to get it solved and move on toward getting my house more livable and pleasing
I will be holding my breath. In the past after using that bathroom, the water wasn't present on the floor until about the 4-5 day of using it - I had 2 plumbers out who were clueless

enough about my bathroom ! I am Grateful and Thankful to have a home, food, clothes, family ...
to be sober, clean and smoke-free
for Precious to be here and give her little cat love
for the joy of nature at my finger tips
and, for the Grace of God
thank YOU

life safari - Thanksgiving Day

2008-11-27T10:13:00.002-06:00

Try not to eat too much turkey and end up like this today.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

good books that hold my interest. I am now reading The Shack by William P. Young
for friends who call and E-mail "Happy Thanksgiving wishes" thank you
another day of life
that it is a mild weather - day
for fellowship with family
for a wonderful story about life in dAAve's post this morning
for God's Grace
for Precious and her companionship
that I am sober, clean, smoke-free - most of all, I am alive and well and able to sit up and take nourishment
I have no idea what my sister's menu is today but I look forward to whatever it is
to still be a bit shy about my spiritual worship - I just can not seem to feel at ease as I did in the past
perhaps I still have too many questions and doubts
there was a time that I would never say or admit this out loud
I also know that when I stop thinking about it all so much, I will come to a natural and pleasing conclusion
I tell myself - "have faith" and "let go and Let God"

life safari 11-26-08

2008-11-26T11:42:00.003-06:00

Thank you Lord for the beauties of Nature all around me. I feel closest to God when I am enjoying the sights and sounds of the living things - animals, birds, plants, flowers...

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am alive to see and hear the beauty right in my own yard
to be sober, clean and smoke-free another day
another day without some unwelcome chaos
that Precious is in my life
that all of you that read this are in my life - well, we all know of one exception (the chaos I refered to)
the day off tomorrow and possibly Friday too
to sit at the dinner table with my family tomorrow and enjoy their company and good food
for the Grace of God - I am coming out of one more "dry" periods of spirituality
I may have finally put to rest my doubts regarding my beliefs
the knowledge that no one can go through my trials for me
for this beautiful weather
to be alive and well
thank YOU

life safari 11-25-08

2008-11-25T10:25:00.002-06:00

Boy, I wish I was on this road right now. A vacation would be a welcome reprieve about now.

Happy Tuesday everyone ! M/S has given me a nice gift - they will have no meetings this week -yahoo !!!! No late nights. That's almost as good as a vacation. Or, at least it will suffice for now.

I am Grateful and Thankful for...

my life as it is today - it needs tweaking, but all is well
Precious and I are well and have each other's company
the relatively "cold" temperatures are nice. It warms up nicely during the afternoon
a relaxing morning
another day of being sober, clean and smoke-free
Thanksgiving day with my sister and brother-in-law
that I am not sad about anything today (as opposed to the recent past)
that it is a beautiful, clear and bright day
that I truly like The Secret Life of Bees - a great read !
thank YOU

life safari 11-21-08

2008-11-21T10:05:00.003-06:00

my nose feels t h i s big

Friday -yeah !! I only wish I felt better physically. Had to breathe through my mouth last night and woke up very dry at 6:00 am.

Couldn't go back to sleep for knowledge of needing to wrap some pipes outside. So, around 8:30, I got wrapped up and got the pipes wrapped up nice and warm.

I would really like to stay home today but am not able to do so.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

getting the pipes wrapped

that this cold will run it's course - eventually

to have reading material at work that I can enjoy

that Friday's are relatively slow

for Precious

many other things I am grateful for which I am not listing here today

life safari 11-20-08

2008-11-20T09:25:00.002-06:00

Another beautiful day (somewhat foggy) and, it's payday. Hopefully the boss will remember to go pick up our checks.

I seem to have been in a place of fantasy for awhile. Although friends and loved ones tried to shed light on the issues, I would have none of it. Now, upon digging into research on my own, I find that what they were trying to tell me, is in fact, what I have discovered in my research.

The subject has to do with the Bible and religion. I have many questions for my Sponsor and now have ears to hear what he has to say. Unlike in times past.

Now, I get to find a place where I can be comfortable - in my own skin, in the manner in which I want to worship, and begin anew - with eyes and heart open to new ways of thinking and living.

It amazes me how silly (sheepish) I feel regarding these matters. However, I am not going to dwell on this point. I am going to ask, listen, dig, read as much as possible, as I have done, and carve out a space for myself that is comfortable and workable.

I feel like a new person this morning. Last evening I felt like I had been hit with a frying pan.
(good to have a hard head sometimes).

It is Thursday and a good day to be alive !

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the love and patience of my friends/loved ones
for work and paydays
that Precious is an awesome cat and lives with me
for an awakening that sets me on a new path
to realize that it's all about The Love

life safari 11-19-08

2008-11-19T11:19:00.003-06:00

Well, too bad that the fanatic and highly ill mikey is back on the scene.

I have reported his discremenitory and lewd blogs to the powers that be of blogs and internet.

He is actually being watched and monitored now, so, he may be off the line very soon - Praise God.

For this, I am very Grateful and Thankful.

Also, just found out that a friend from the past was found deceased a week or so ago.

So sorry my friend ! Her passing has been very hard on one of my other friends and I hold both in my heart and prayers.

I am most Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am alive and well today

Precious is too

I am thinking ahead about my own arrangements for my day of passing

I finally got someone at the funeral home to get off of high-center and look into my inquiry

this beautiful weather-wow, it makes being alive so rich and refreshing

for the home I have and the beauty of the atrium area - such as it is

I say this because a friend has a much prettier setup at her home and I tend to wish that is what I have - rather, I am Blessed to have what I have and appreciate it

Thank YOU God for the Blessings of my home and set-up

I sometimes want what I do not have and forget that I have something other's wish they had

I am Blessed to have anything - what I have is very special to me at this very moment

today, I am going to hang onto this feeling of Gratitude for the Blessings I have right here, right now

Thanks Be to God

Amen

life safari 11-18-08

2008-11-18T12:10:00.003-06:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SCOTT !!!!!

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

for this absolutely fantastic day in Houston

for my sobriety and my friend's, Scott W

for Precious

that the dark mood of last night has left me

for God's Grace

thank YOU

life safari 11-17-08

2008-11-17T23:07:00.003-06:00

I heard a news report just a few moments ago and it just had me in tears on my knees.
A horse, someones pet was found dead from being struck between the eyes with a sledge hammer. I am absolutely stricken with grief. How can man be so cruel to animals. How can man be so cruel to man. What sort of person or persons can do this type of cruelty? Animals, I reason, can't talk back, can be tied up and restrained to have this hell visited upon them. But, right after that thought comes to mind that the same things are done to people too - every day some place in this world. How truly tragic and sad. God forgive us - mankind-mancruel

tonight, I am Grateful and Thankful...

that seeing a stray cat at the Post Office on my way home, I am so happy and grateful that Precious is safe and sound

I held her to me tightly and kissed her as I always do when I see animals running loose. I'm so glad she is safe !

that I do not miss drinking

that Jack is in remission. He has a cancer scan Dec. 2nd. I am praying that he will be cancer-free and remain so - it is a Miracle that he is in remission after his condition from radiation

I am doing well on my diet and exercise routine this week

that there are plenty of non-fattening crunchy foods I can eat to dull hunger

that I am not or do I know any cruel people

for the pleasure of friendship. Mary, a friend has come back into my life and I am enjoying our times together

for a social weekend

for having 11 years sober and clean today

that I celebrated with friends and family at the noon meeting

that I am moved to pray for man's cruelty to cease

for God's Grace

thank YOU

2008-11-13T10:29:00.003-06:00

Saturday, Nov. 15th, 2008 I am (and a friend) going to a Punk Rock concert.

My hair dresser and some of her friends had a very famous band called MyDolls. They actually toured and got on radio and many other accolades before they stopped playing in 1986.

I was not aware of Trish until just a bit later. My best friend back when knew Trish and went to her gigs. There is another band member whom I know and, again, much later met.

Now, the two are playing at the Noise and Smoke fate Saturday night @ Notsuoh/

Dean's. The MyDolls go on stage at 11:00 pm. Mary and I will be there, I hope you will join us Saturday Night.

This morning, I am Grateful and Thankful...

just to be alive another day

to have eyes and ears to see and hear the beautiful birds that visit in the atrium

that I have a job

that God gave me the company of Precious

apparently Lucy is hanging in there and is still giving her love to clients at Wavelength Salon

that I got up and at 'em early this morning

for the Grace of God

Thank YOU

life safari 11-12-08

2008-11-12T10:19:00.002-06:00

Good morning. Houston has been getting some daily rain - we have needed some.

I don't know why or when I decided this but 12 is my favorite number. It's even, it's nice and big - soothing to my eyes. It sounds good when said -twelve - nice !

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

to be alive another day
that I am healthy
I am sober, clean and smoke-free
I live with a cat that is the most Precious thing that owns me
to have plans for the weekend - something out of the ordinary
to be able to feel pain for a friend as she faces the impending death of a beloved pet
that I have been privileged to know Lucy - a wonderful Golden Retriever
We will still have our Rosie, Lucy's pal. Rosie went through some hairy physical trials in the past as well (another awesome Golden Retriever)
the Grace of God - without which I am toast
thank YOU

I would like to mention :
Houston lost our little 2 year old elephant at the Houston Zoo Sunday. It was unexpected, fast and very devastating to all the Zoo personnel
One of many elephants we have lost to herpesvirus in our history - very unfortunate. Not a "sexual" cause of the virus. As a matter of fact, humans carry this virus in our body. No one knows what sets it off.

You were well loved and will be greatly missed, Mac !

life safari - 11-9-08

2008-11-09T17:26:00.002-06:00

What a nice day and evening this is.

The weather today was as perfect as it can be for this time of year here in H-Town.

A friend from my recent past called and we got together today after church. We laughed and talked and had a wonderful time. I have not laughed that much or that loud in a very long time !

She has recently remodeled her home. She did the work herself and it is absolutely beautiful ! Mary is her name and she rewired her home, laid new floors, laid new tile and many other things. It is a nice thing to know that if you have the will, are willing to read books and get in and TRY (yes, she was stumped a time or two), one can get it done and save that money to hire it out.
She has a beautiful back yard. Her home backs up to a cooling lake from a sugar mill off of Oyster Creek. Her landscaping, gardens and laid stone walkways she also put in herself.
To top all this off - she shed 65 pounds in the process !

So, I have a good example of a woman who tried, did and I can give it a shot too. She has lit a fire under me. And, I have neighbors who will gladly give me a hand if I need help.

So, in the near future I will get this flooring up and start with that task. I will probably hire a couple of men who are eagar for work that wait outside Home Depot. I'm certain they will be more than happy to earn some wages and I can spare having my back and sciatic nerve irritated.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the Grace of God
for Precious - my sweet, loving cat
that Mary called, I responded and we are renewing our friendship after many years
for her openness to accompany me to a 80's Punk Rock concert next Saturday night
the affection that Lucy (a fine Golden Retriever) bestowed on me when I went to my haircutter's salon for my haircuts. Lucy is gravely ill with kidney disease. She is a loving, and very loved girl !
that I am at such peace at this moment. Laughter is indeed the best medicine
I intend to do more of that and a lot of it !
I feel so good I may even get up on the dance floor Saturday night and bounce around (dance)
Thank YOU
Trish, Lucy, Rosie - you are all in my heart and prayers !
I love you and I am sad

life safari

2008-11-05T22:41:00.004-06:00

Oh Boy ! AAAAAHHHHHH. I have finally begun breathing again today.

I am excited and happy about the future. I am very happy that I did get involved in the election. I was not interested really in any of the four people running and was not going to vote.

But, when Colin Powell endorsed Obama, I said, O.K., that's my candidate. I happen to have much respect for Powell. I would have voted for him had he run.

It looks to me as though the nation is in giddy happiness and daring to dream of peace, equality and brotherhood.

I am happy, joyous and free today !

Praise God and Thank YOU

life safari-Tuesday

2008-11-04T10:31:00.002-06:00

Happy Tuesday !

I am Grateful and Thankful to be:

alive and well

to have a faith and trust in the Lord

to live with a very special cat

able to see and listen to the birds that come to feed and play

sober, clean and smoke-free another day

for the elections to soon be over

to have a movie to watch tonight - I have had enough of the election

in a country where I may worship as I choose

Thank YOU

life safari 11-3-08

2008-11-03T11:12:00.002-06:00

Wow, this day is a perfect weather happening in H-Town today. And, with the time change back to standard time (of which my body clock runs best on), I am filled with gratitude and happiness !

Well, yesterday at the outdoor Rosary service (at the cemetery), my worst fears came true - I blubbered off and on through the entire service. Oh well, I stuck it out, didn't leave and in the end met some very nice folks and had lovely chats before the service. Priests went to all of our grave sites and blessed the graves - (and the people, of course). Since there were far more people that came than expected, the Priests had their hands full. I bet there were 100-150 people at the service. Standing room only. But a day like today - very pretty with a nice breeze on occasion.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

that I decided to participate in the All Souls service yesterday
to be able to cry when I feel sad or overwhelmingly joyful
what a gift to my spirit to not feel I want to hide my emotions today
for the "community" yesterday at the service
also for the sense of aloneness with my feelings of loss that I feel for my departed loved ones
I miss them all terribly. I believe we never say goodbye for the 'last' time but, I do miss them here and now. And yes, I tend to cry about that
and that is just o.k. today
God's Grace Precious
the visitation by the doves and blue jay on the atrium this morning. The jay acually nabbed a baby lizard for his nest
one less for Precious to hunt but,
All Is Well With Our Souls This Day
thank YOU

All Soul's Day 2008

2008-11-02T09:38:00.002-06:00

Happy Sunday, beautiful weather here in Houston this morning.

Last year at this time, I had, for the first time participated in "the Day of the Dead" at church.
I posted a poster of my deceased loved ones in one of our chapels and it was a most freeing and satisfying experience. Also, their names were listed in a book for prayers by members of the church who devote time exclusively to that end. Last year the chapel was filled with photos. This year, sadly, very few are participating. I wonder why. However, I didn't either. Perhaps once is enough.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I had a wonderful lunch with my friend Sonny yesterday
I signed up to celebrate my AA birthday at Lambda on Nov. 22nd
had a wonderful experience before Mass yesterday, one that I had not expected
I am so glad, however, for the experience (above)
I cried, as usual, a few times during Mass
you know, I don't even get ashamed or feel "funny" over it any longer. I am very sensitive and have always been. Yes, I tried all my life to hide that fact from other's - no longer
I actually like being as sensitive as I am today
was able to extend myself to someone whom I do not know but is living in "survival" mode
for the love of God - He gave me Precious (and much more)
I get to honor the memory and death of my parents today
that along with my parents, I will be honoring and thinking of the rest of my deceased family and friends
Thank YOU

life safari 10-31-08

2008-10-31T11:23:00.003-05:00

Well, it's Friday. This is my least favorite "hollowday" so,excuse my not in the mood of it.

I tried twice to post yesterday but just couldn't get in the mood. All this election business and smear -type talk has just saturated me lately. I, too look forward to it all being over. We've lived this stuff for almost the entire year ! Good gosh, I dread the next election -over-kill.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I can take my mind off of the political scene with All Saint's Day and All Soul's Day this weekend

Precious is out in the atrium enjoying this wonderful weather day

although I am years from losing several people I love, I am missing them very much right now

It seems that I get melancoly around this time each year. I begin thinking of those whom are no longer with me. Those whom gathered to eat together at the Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner tables.

This is one reason I had such a difficult time posting yesterday - putting these feelings into words is difficult

it is my intention to go to a Rosary service Sunday for All Soul's Day, honoring my deceased parents

I will be eternally grateful if I can get through the service without blubbering through it all

I have my doubts

I am going to try-I can always leave if I am unable to make it

Thank YOU

God's Grace

Photo above - my parents in better times

life safari 10-29-08

2008-10-29T11:56:00.003-05:00

I wish I had not opened an E-mail from a friend.

I had a morbid curiosty regarding the smear campaign inclosed in the E-mail - I regret reading it.

Not only am I sick of friends who claim to be so very pious and "good", I am disappointed that they are so ignorant and shallow. It is these very people that fuel the desires of the "skin-head" killers among us.

I am sad today that these so-called "friends" of mine continue to send this Hate-Monger mail after I asked them to pass me by on all political subjects PERIOD.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be working toward a more peacable and loving kathy
to be genuinely saddened by the kind of lies and half-truths - smears and defaming things that people use in the name of being "Republican."
that yes, I am standing up. I DO want CHANGE and, a lot of it !
that although something I wrote yesterday was misunderstood, I know what I meant and I was not complaining
And, I am not complaining now, now I am stating my disappointment and shock
Precious
God's Grace
Thank YOU

and, no more of this HATE-MONGER mail - you know who you are

life safari 10-28-08

2008-10-28T12:05:00.003-05:00

Wow, already it's Tuesday ! Was a bit "nippy" this morning. But, it sure beats the heat of this summer - especially when I had no power after Ike.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

a new contact on my Blog. Welcome and thank you for writing Peek-A-Boo Street !
I have much to to research and will not get all the articles printed this morning. I am reading up on WWI and the resultant condition of the Middle East (BBC has a very unbiased outlook)
I read some of the articles at work yesterday - it opened my eyes to much
the desire to be more open minded/open hearted regarding peoples who are different than I
for the life I have with Precious in it-I love to watch her in cold weather. She fluffs up like a bird and lays on her little hands(paws)
I will trade any trips for a longer life with my Precious girl
the fact that all the "Hate-Mongers" out there do not faze me-I love my "delete" button !
I pray for peace. Just a day of World Peace. And, if we can do it for a day, it can be done longer
I work on "dropping the rock" every day. Some situations I fail at it but, I now re-group and remember the bigger picture
God's Grace and Salvation
thank YOU

life safari 10-27-08

2008-10-27T11:32:00.003-05:00

Monday. What a beautiful weather day in H-town.

I am heartened by a response from a friend regarding my blog yesterday. Thank you, dAAve.
Have no fear that I am staying sober and clean. The last months of my drinking almost killed me. And what I am really in touch with is that, I might have killed someone else.

I am completely understanding on the point that our celebrating at birthday nights can inspire other's. But, I have truly run out of things to say up there. The past two years - especially last year - I thanked AA and God for my sobriety and the life I have today. No more than that can I really say. AA led me (after many, many years) to a Spiritual awareness. Then, after some years, I needed something more than Spirituality. That need was for a religion. I set out to add to a rudimentary beginning in the Catholic faith. Now, a few years later, I worship and lead a life as a Catholic. My journey in becoming a Catholic Christian is not what anyone wants to hear at an AA birthday night celebration. And, that is my story today. So, my inspiration has a pretty limited audience, I suspect.
I don't believe I need to appear so people can see me-as if to prove that I am still sober and clean. Some people will believe whatever they want and make up whatever they want to believe with or without any facts. What has that got to do with me?

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for this Fall day. What a beauty !!
for friends and family
for Precious who knows me and loves me anyway
for Frank who knows me and loves me anyway
for dAAve and his up-lifting words and support
God's Grace
my life today after a period of dryness and strife
to KNOW that God performed a miracle in my life the other day
and, to know that that was absolutely NOT the first or only Miracle
thank YOU

life safari 10-26-08

2008-10-26T19:32:00.004-05:00

Well, Sunday evening and the close of another weekend. Once again, it has passed too soon.

This Friday will be the end of October. Where has this year gone? I will celebrate 11 years sober and clean November 17th. I am happy about the fact that I am still sober and clean and now too, smoke -free.

I do not think I will be celebrating at Lambda Center this go round. I am not attending meetings there much - actually, hardly at all. My AA friends most likely will feel that I am making a wrong decision on this. I can not help what they will think. I do not want to lose the few friends and family I have from AA either. They mean very much to me. I do, however find that when I go to Lambda, I feel discontent and wonder why I went. I go to see the few folks that I love. That is where they hang out. It is just not my hang out any more. I find more solace and peace in church and have for some time now.

The above is difficult. I have needed to say it for some time, however. I guess there is never a good time to risk losing friendships after several years. My hope and wish is that I will not, of course. The path I have been on for nearly a year is one I have wanted to be on for many years but was too afraid I would not want it after I got into it.

With all that aside, I have been honest and have told my truth. I only trust that my friends will accept my truth and support me and love me. Even if it is not the path they want me to follow.

I only ask: love me where I am and for whom I am. And stay in touch as we do through our blogs.

Friday evening had a beautiful experience at the Villa de Matel Chapel. It was a Taize' Prayer Service and the chapel was absolutely stunningly beautiful ! The grounds, the Mother House, they have a Villa Grotto, it is very serene there.

I will include a photo or two at the end if they will transfer.

I have been over-whelmed with emotion of late. I will be going to a Rosary for All Souls Day at the cemetary where my parents are both buried and I am already crying when I think about it.

These devotional experiences are exactly the reason I am so happy to be a Catholic. It is a beautiful religion (to me) and I can not keep a from tearing up even at regular Mass. The words to songs, the words we say in our Mass, the thought of why we are there and what we are celebrating - just an over-whelming of emotions to me.

Not that I mind. I feel deeply any more. I am not ashamed for tears to stream down my face any more. There was a time I did mind. I was a "closet cryer."

Well, I guess I have rattled on enough. I just needed to get some things out in the open.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for God's Grace

for Precious

for friends and family

to be sober, clean and smoke-free

for the experiences of new things

for the courage to speak out and risk being hurt or rejected

for voting my conscience

for the All Souls Celebration and walking through my fears to attend and participate

Christ has died. Christ has risen. Christ will come again

thank YOU

life safari 10-22-08

2008-10-22T09:30:00.004-05:00

Well, I am setting out to go vote early after my shower.

Something made me decide that this election has someone that I can vote in favor for - a change from before.

It's an absolutely beautiful Fall day here and more cooler weather is predicted - a bit of rain too.

M/S meeting went on until after 9:00 pm last night. It was supposed to end at 8:00 pm.

I handled the above situation better than I have in the past, which is a good thing if one wants to stay employed.

I am learning to take life easier. When I get all bent out of shape, it seems to only hurt me - no one else gives a hoot. Most people are out in the ozone, thinking about numero uno which, of course, so am I. So, I'm no different than every one else and, therefor, I should not be so hard on every one else. We really ARE in this together...

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...
finally feel like voting for a "cause"
to be alive and well
to live in a country where I don't risk being killed for my Christian beliefs
that Precious is a part of my life
I have a beautiful double yellow hybiscus bloom on a plant that has not produced in over a year
for this great Houston weather
to be back on a shift where I have my mornings free
I enjoy reading my friend's Blogs
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 10-21-08

2008-10-21T09:53:00.000-05:00

Happy Tuesday morning. It is another beautiful day in H-Town.
I got paid yesterday, the last of all those crazy long hours I worked for a few weeks. Glad I'm back to my old shift hours again.
Sunday, I was invited and attended the Houston Grand Opera. Saw two one-act operas and enjoyed them both. The second opera I like better but only because it was set in the 1940's.

Also, this Friday I am leaving work early to attend a Taize prayer service at the Villa de Matel Chapel. I really look forward to this. Frank tells me that the chapel is beautiful. I have seen the grounds of the Villa. I know it is very peaceful and pretty.
The Villa de Matel is the Sisters of Charity of the incarnate Word retirement home. It has a Grotto on the premises that I long to go sit in one of these days. Perhaps on another outing at the grounds.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

for this Precious gift pictured above that brings me joy and happiness
that the weather is so special right now
to have a job that lets me be sort of "out in the gorgeous day"
for God's Grace
Thank YOU

life safari 10-20-08

2008-10-20T11:51:00.002-05:00

What a beautiful Monday. And, it's payday for me.

I had a nice, restful weekend. Accompanied Frank to 2 short (1 act each) operas yesterday. I enjoyed both but especially the second.

Attended the beautiful Memorial for Melody also. What a beautiful person she is and her effect on other's was unmistakable.

This lovely Fall weather and temperature soothes me and brings out the better of my Nature.

I am Grateful for/that...

my health
my life as I know it today. I have had a much different life in the past. One of travel, horses and that whole life-style. Too much activity crammed into one 24 hour period in the past. Yes, I miss a great deal of that past today but, some of the things that surrounded and permeated in that life were hard lessons for me. Lessons that, fortunately, in time have lost their sting.
Precious and her little, loving, Being
God's Grace and Salvation
Thank YOU

life safari 10-18-08

2008-10-18T10:38:00.000-05:00

Well, good morning and Happy Saturday !!
It is a banner day here in Houston. Cool, clear weather. Just right for being alive.

I am showing off my Precious little one. I took these photos of her soon after I brought her home some years past. Now, when I get out the camera, she gives me a "MO THERRRRR !" back-glance as she flees for the spot under the bed.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I have a job that I get the weekends off - what a Blessing. I worked many weekends in Retail
to get up early (thanks to my Little Darl'n here) and enjoy the coldness of Fall weather for a good change
I was able to stall Precious for 3 hours this morning. She, well, her stomach is still on my early shift schedule. She started working on waking me to feed her at 4:00 this morning. I was able to sleep until 7:00.
for God's gift of Precious in my life
for meeting Frank later for dinner - Blackened Chicken with Linguine and Chipotle/Alfredo sauce - YUMMY
that I have kept to my prayers and devotions all week - it makes a big difference in my attitude and behavior
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 10-17-08

2008-10-17T07:52:00.000-05:00

Wow, one more month and I will have 11 (eleven) years sober and clean ! Awesome. One of my favorite photos of Precious, my beloved cat, is what I call "Precious, praying HER Rosary."

I am such a Blessed woman, I can not express the joy and pleasure this little cat has brought to my life in the years we have been together. Thank YOU Lord for allowing me to be at the SPCA at that particular day and moment in time.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

this beautiful cooler weather
to be up and welcome the sun rise this morning
for Precious and her "little cat ways"
to be alive and well
that today is Friday
to have a busy weekend planned. Much socialization-some somber, some joyous
that Precious got us up and awake very early. Now, I will have time for everything today
for a good book to read. It got so scary last night that I had to stop reading it. I didn't want bad dreams
for old friends. For new friends
to be going to my favorite restaurant tomorrow -Spaghetti Western ! (with Frank-one of my favorite people)
for God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 10-15-08

2008-10-15T12:12:00.003-05:00

Good morning ! I can not tell you how good it is to get back to my "regular" work schedule. Many changes have happened because of the drop in hours. I have time for prayer and devotions which give me a sense of well-being and peace. I sleep better, deeper and wake more rested. The ills that I had sought a Doctor's visit for have ceased.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for the zeal for God returning
a new friend to correspond with through E-mails (Akannie), WELCOME
that it is the middle of the week - Praise God
for this very full picture included here. It tells of Jesus' life
friends and family that fulfill my life and heart
for a bit of rain and thunder this morning
that the sun is shining now
for the very full moon lately. How gorgeous. And man thinks THEY made all of this?
for God's Grace and LOVE
Thank YOU

life safari 10-14-08

2008-10-14T20:46:00.002-05:00

Oh boy, I was so busy at work today. I collected $ 164.00 in 5 hours ! Tomorrow is looking like more of the same, perhaps more.

I have a message that I am to have an "outage" in 8 minutes.

Good thing I didn't have anything else to say other than,

Thank YOU Lord for all your awesome Grace and Love !

life safari 10-13-08

2008-10-13T09:18:00.003-05:00

Good Morning ! Another Federal Holiday.

It is a beautiful day. I start my new work schedule today and I am more excited than words will express. I am back to my 2:00 pm - 7:00 pm shift. Yes, I will be required to stay with the MS people until 9-9:30 pm on occasion but, that is more preferable than these 8 hours I've been pulling.

I was saddened to hear of an AA acquaintances death. Melody J. I have been told she did not linger or suffer and Praise God for that Blessing ! I will attend her Wake next Sunday.

Akannie has been staying in touch and I just want to acknowledge your presence and your thoughts and prayers as I was going through my suffering Thursday and Friday. Thank you so much, I appreciated reading your comments. God Bless You !

I have not heard from Ungodly Sobriety lately. I hope you are well. Drop me a line when able. I'm thinking about you.

I am going to the 12:15 AA meeting today at Lambda. I have not attended a meeting in a very long time. I look forward to seeing everyone and the empty chair that Melody J used to inhabit will be a reminder of her passing.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for a wonderful Saturday with friends and loved ones

to get out of Houston and up to the hills Saturday

for getting to Mass Sunday and rest the after that

for a new work schedule where I don't have to set my alarm for 4:30 am any longer

that I don't have to set an alarm at all-even better !

for Precious. My loving and wonderful side-kick. What a gift from God she is

for a good night's sleep

that I don't have to get all crazy about the Presidential elections as some do

for the Love, Grace and Salvation of the Lord

Thank YOU

life safari 10-10-08

2008-10-11T05:23:00.002-05:00

Good morning. Happy Saturday.

Well, by the Grace of God, I am still employed and all is well. I can only tell you that God works in mysterious ways. End of story today.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

The Grace of God
Precious
friends
family
Thank YOU

life safari 10-10-08

2008-10-10T05:15:00.003-05:00

Today is finally Friday. I have anxiously waited for the week to pass. Now, here it is and it is a day I wish to skip.

I must show up at work today, knowing I will most likely be fired. This is that point, that one last chance and, even I would fire me over this one !

The part of this that I loathe is that, now I must wait - it could be today, Monday, what day?
Nothing anyone can do to me can be as bad as what my head is doing to me since my infraction.

The end to this will be the relief. Yet, I must go in, face my sin-confess it and live with the consequences. A stupid, off - the - cuff "joke" I made to a customer that was, not only a touch off-color in it's meaning but to someone that I do not have that type kidding relationship with in the first place.

What was I thinking? Obviously, I was not. To make matters worse, in her talking to me, she almost got hit by a gate coming down. I am Toast, cooked, fired !

There is no justifying this breach. I can only give this in my defense: I'm very tired physically and mentally right now. There was a lot of chaos as I was trying to leave the booth yesterday and, I grab at humor to relieve my stress sometimes. Unfortunately, in this case, there was a disconnect in appropriateness. I feel terrible about this situation. All of it.

Had the customer not been exchanging words with me, she would not have been in harm's way of the gate.

I only wish I had made my exit two minutes earlier. That is all it took for me to ruin almost 3 good years of service in my job. Now I get to live in self-flagellation until the hour of dismissal.

What I must face with this knowledge and the waiting for the hour, is far more punishment than anyone else can heap on me.

This trip into the job is the bravest step I have taken in a long time. I also am not trying to justify my "insanity of the moment."

I must understand the why's of this matter so as not to repeat this kind of tragedy.

I do think that I have been working a shift that was far too long and lasted longer than I was able to hold up in.

Eight hours in that booth with the happenings that go on daily - I think may have been over-reaching for my ability.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

to be sober and clean
that no matter what, I can tell the truth today
Precious
God's Grace
thankYOU

life safari 10-8-08

2008-10-08T05:33:00.003-05:00

Wednesday ! I am excited that we are in the middle of this week and moving toward the end.

It is quite cool out this morning, almost chilly, in fact.

Hearing about the antics of the CEO of AIG and their luxurious expenditures after our "tax-payer" retirement funds went to bail them out has left a real bad taste in my mouth.

This kind of lack of respect and regard for the "little people" is what turns me off. These banks that are buying up other banks that have succumbed to failure -they'll be looking for a bailout too. How does buying someone else's bad debts keep one solvent? Greed and more greed is what it says to me.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I am not having to borrow any money at this time

my weekend is going to be laid back but getting things done that I have been putting off

the weather is getting cooler

I got a good physical health report yesterday. Now I just need to get a better mental health going for myself

the encouragement that I CAN start taking life's problems less to heart

through a little book written by a Priest, I can relate that part of my problems stem from the "it's all about ME" syndrome

the mind can make one sick. My mind can make me sick (physically)

no more of that business. Starting today, I take things with a grain of salt, nothing is worth getting so upset that I have a heart attack over and, I breathe more often. That's right, breathe

my mind doesn't seem to understand that word B R E A T H E - a new concept

Precious - as Akannie commented, I am fortunate to have Precious in my life. Yes, Akannie, I am indeed. What a joy she is !

God's Grace. God's Patience. God's Forgiveness. God's Mercy.

thank YOU

life safari 10/7/08

2008-10-07T07:12:00.003-05:00

Tuesday. Well, I finally received that big check. And, I gotta tell ya, it was well worth the wait !
WOW.

Thank goodness I don't foresee having to put in those amount of hours again.

I don't want to get ready for work. But, I am going to have to.

I am Grateful and Thankful ....

rain is in our forecast for the day
I had a low-key evening of television watching
Precious lives with me
God's Grace

life safari 10-6-08

2008-10-06T06:03:00.002-05:00

Monday, perhaps I'll get my check today.

Had a very relaxing weekend. I enjoyed having all the doors opened yesterday that have screens on them - it reminded me of that attic fan we had when I was a kid. It was so powerful and created a big draft in the house.

I wish it wasn't Monday already. I'm not ready to go back to work.

We have a big, barking dog next door now-a friend for the loud, rambunctious boys. How lucky I am...

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that rain is in the forecast. We can use some
for a very restful weekend
that, if all goes well, I will actually get that check today
for Precious and her quiet company and cuteness
that I have good Doctors and we have a history established
I put in for a couple of coupons for this "digitalization" t.v. happening
to have a job. To have a job so close to home. But, I wish I could take a long vacation. Or, just go back to bed for a few hours
to have gone to church yesterday. We have our choir AND incense back after their vacation
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 10-04-08

2008-10-04T10:20:00.003-05:00

thank goodness it's Saturday. No alarm to have to wake me, no place I have to be - what a beautiful thing.

I had to go next door and make an amends to my new neighbor first thing. He was very gracious and all is well. I am so thankful that I am trying to change my ways and live a more Christian life. I fail so much, so often. It is the Grace of God that He (the Lord) loves Saints AND Sinners.

I guess I was not supposed to receive my paycheck for 09-01 thru 09-15. My boss thought the 5th (our paydays are the 5th and 20th of ech month) fell on Monday. So, we have been denied our check until Monday now. That particular check, as you may recall, was a topic of one of my worst Blog "bitches."

I am soon to go to get my car washed, go to the recyclers and drop my plastics and paper, go to Sacco and shop till I drop, then, pick up Frank and go to dAAve's house warming. So,

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

Akannie is corresponding thru blogs. Yes, Akannie, Precious IS just that. Thankyou.
my new neighbor was very gracious in accepting my amends
I am ok with my boss forgetting my check Friday
I get to go to Sacco and look for Christmas Cards for this year
that I, thanks to the seasonal changes, do not have to do yard work today or tomorrow
God loves me and forgives my sins and transgressions when I ask
I started the day with prayer and devotion which I have gotten out of the habit of doing for some reason
Precious is well and happy
I am , for the most part, well and happy
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 10-3-08

2008-10-03T06:57:00.004-05:00

"it was THIS big !" "no."

TGIF !!!!!!!

And, a HUGE paycheck today for the weeks of Sept. 1-15th !

Going to Sacco tomorrow (teehee). Sacco is a Catholic Store where, when I was a "beginning Catholic, I spent much time and money. Now, I rarely go but look forward to a nice long shopping spree tomorrow.

And, dAAve and Hayden's open house.

Today, I am Grateful and Thankful...

for a good night's sleep last night

that today is a much lighter day at work (Praise God!)

for Precious. What a beautiful cat Spirit I adopted 7 years ago

for God's Grace

Peace to all

thank YOU

life safari 10-2-08

2008-10-02T05:22:00.003-05:00

Oh my gosh ! I'm blogging before dAAve this morning ! Can' believe it. He is always up and at'em earlier than anyone. I hope you're ok dAAve and just not at the keyboard yet.

What a MMMMarvelous, cool morning this is in Houston. Oh Boy, I can't wait to see the gorgeous sun rise that will go with it as I drive in this morning.

It's a good day to be alive. I don't care what the stock exchange is doing !

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

God Blessed me with Precious. This cat is the most "human" feline. I think she actually laughs at me sometimes. She is a joy to wake up to. When she wants me up she licks me with that sandpaper tongue - she knows it works

I fell asleep last night in the middle of reading the paper. It happens alot these days

Yesterday is the first time that I remember absolutely feeling that if I didn't get out of that box I work in I would scream ! We had a very busy day that got even busier as I needed to be wrapping up my day. Hopefully today will be more calm.

Precious has an inclosed area (atrium) in which to go out and be a cat. I just liberated her. I just hope the mosquitos will leave her alone

the grass has not been growing as fast as it had been. And, the ash tree pods are not taking over the area. Perhaps I can skip dowing yard work this weekend and rest, go walking in the park, etc.

new people, folks I have not met yet, visit my blog and comment. Thank you, I look forward to exchanging visits with you Akannie

God's Grace and salvation

Thank YOU

life safari 10-01-08

2008-10-01T05:57:00.002-05:00

October. Another month down and closer to the end of another year. Wow, where does the time go?

Feeling frisky !

I am Grateful and Thankful...

that the weather is getting cooler - what a relief from this hot summer

Precious and I are well and together. She is a loving gift to me from the Good Lord

The yard and atrium look very nice, peaceful and serene from my labors last weekend

soon, if a new-hire shows up, my hours at work will go back to normal. Back on the afternoon shift -yeah !

that with the extra time I will have I can get out before work and walk and use that new weight bench I assembled

that I have insurance. Watched channel 8 last night about folks that have none - it is a killer !

for the Grace and Patience of God. I consider God's patience as my salvation,

thank YOU

life safari 09-30-08

2008-09-30T06:48:00.002-05:00

Good morning. This is the exact type of weather we, in Houston, celebrate after our harsh summers. The down side is the alergens that come along with it. They are affecting me this year.

I am not sorry to see this month draw to an end. It has been a hard month. I have worked many hours on the job, put long hours in the yard after Ike this past weekend. That large Ash tree in my front yard gives much shade and draws the birds that I love to feed and watch. But, when these trees shed their seed pods, it is a major mess to keep the cement swept until winter.

I pulled up several plants that Ike caused to look ragged and twisted. I am already planning what I will plant in the Spring.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

for God's Grace

for Precious - God's gift of love and laughter I get from her (and those beautiful emerald eyes)

that the proposal for buyout was killed - there has to be a different and better plan

thank YOU

life safari 09-26-08

2008-09-26T06:30:00.000-05:00

TGIF !!!!!!!

Today, I am grateful and thankful for...

getting the new weight bench set up last night (by the instructions)
(by the instructions) is a new process for me. I laid all parts out first, counted them and made sure all was there, then, went step by step with the guide - It Worked !
a forecast of much cooler weather this weekend. I will need it for the yard work I've got to do
Aleve and a heating pad. my back relies on both at times
Precious. what an awesome cat and a fun roommate
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 09-25-08

2008-09-25T06:37:00.000-05:00

this picture reminds me of my "magnifying mind." My blog entry two days ago was the culmination of problems that have built up at work. My boss did not err in my paycheck although, he certainly understood why I thought he had. Our company is now holding out about one month's pay. Because we are paid on the 5th and 20th of the month, the divide grows with time. The check was correct - it was the last two weeks of August's pay.
I said a lot of things in anger the other day on my blog.
I have since made my amends to those that were due. Even one that was due me. Peace at any cost has begun to be a good idea to me.

In light of what is happening in the world, my problems seem very small and shallow. This is my "magnifying mind" that blows them up to huge deals. Part of it is selfishness. Part is "it's all about me."
It is a time when discretion and prudence is in order. Also, as my boss pointed out to me, stress causes many illnesses of the body.

I am making new strides to remain calm, look at things from more than one angle(how it affects me) and getting back to those Spiritual activities that help me stay calm and grateful.

I am Grateful and Thankful...

the cooler temperatures
cool days this weekend. I have alot of work to do in the yard
Precious - she is just the coolest cat !
relief from co-worker, Ambesajer, from 5 pm - 7pm. Because of his good attitude I don't have to work 11 hours lately
that Theresa's Galveston house was not destroyed
that a friend from the building across the street from my work shared her news that her ex-husband had shot himself
My heart goes out to you, Jenna and your sons. He is in a better place
God's Grace
thank YOU

life safari 09-22-08

2008-09-22T05:36:00.002-05:00

I am so upset regarding my job, boss, *rude co-worker and situations surrounding work that I am absolutely almost out the door. I have worked 89.0 hours the past two weeks and I got paid for 57.5 on this check. Now, my boss has the timecards in his hand to turn into payroll. How does one miss that many hours? 29 of those shorted hours is overtime. When I start getting shorted money on a job, I start looking for other work - my last employer (Good Neighbor Cleaners) still owes me over $ 300.00. Of course, they went "belly-up" due to incompetency, (Debbie).

*Rude is not all this guy is. He's a constant complainer who does not want a solution for any of his complaints. In fact, I have tried to help him solve several of his problems and have gotten kicked in the teeth for my efforts (figuratively). No, as soon as someone steps up to the plate and helps, he starts backing away and keeps people at an arms length. So, just keep whining and suffering ye co-worker. You wore me out. Not to mention talking to me like a dog when you are unable to handle your work load (in your head). I say, a Shrink and some anti-depressants would do you a world of good.

I want to feel grateful but, I hate to say, I dread going to my work. Had my co-worker "gotten the message" about being polite, cordual and professional in his actions and words, it would not be such a drugery. But, since he is allowed to continue his BS, I will dread going to my job.

My goal is to make a radical change-however that looks. And, to find out how in the hell someone can short an employee that many hours in time when they have the hard copy of the timecard in their hand !?!?

No more excuses and no prisoners in Westchase.

life safari 09/21/08

2008-09-21T19:25:00.003-05:00

Ike - a NASA photograph.

I am Grateful and Thankful for/that...

I, my family and friends lived through this very large and destructive hurricane
Frank and his fellowship today
to have met a woman who is very unselfish with any and everything - Frank's neighbor, Mary
Mary is cooking, supplying ice and care for all in her area - no care for the cost to her. Most unselfish person I have met in a very long time. You ROCK, Mary !!!!
Precious and her wonderful, sweet self
Mass this morning. I have not attended for a few weeks
that I have availability to good medical treatment. I am going to need to seek some out this week
alarms that work and keep me from over-sleeping
although I dread going to work this week, I will go and do my best to make it the best experience that I can
God's Grace and Love
thank YOU

life safari 09-20-08

2008-09-20T01:56:00.000-05:00

Early A.M. Saturday morning. Have been redoing my Blog Profile and photo.

This goes out to Ungodly Sobriety:

I want to thank you for your following, your interest. I went to your blog but was not able to set up a following for me on your blog. I am not very good at this. I know very little and what I have learned cost me many hair-raising and hair pulling nights.

I want to tell you that I am very proud for you to have over 6 months of sobriety. I assume you attend meetings at Lambda by some of the blog names that you listed.

I have not attended there in quite awhile. I will have 11 years sober and clean this November 17th. But, I have been in and out of AA for around 25 years.

I just wanted to make a contact with you and and I'll be tuning in to your Blog so hopefully we can talk some.

I am up late because I am very agitated right now. I have written more entries to my blog in the last two days than I have in months.

I am very tired and am going to breakfast with a friend later this morning. I have got to at least lay down and get some rest.

Well, I'm glad you are open to being sober for now and giving it a go. Hope to have an exchange of ideas and conversation with you later.

peanut

life safari 09-19-08

2008-09-19T20:05:00.002-05:00

The saga of "the job" (mine) and the "bail out" (AIG, Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, FDIC, others I can't even think of right now) has me just ready to pack up, sell the house, withdraw any and all investments and move. Pay Ceasar what is Ceasar's out of the investments for early withdrawal and flee ! I am not sure I will have anything left considering the Government is spending all our funds.

Most of these failing companies got themselves into trouble by their own GREED ! Now, the markets are tapped out and their left with worthless mortgages and other strapped investments that they can't get loans for (and rightly so), we're having to pick up the tab. Well, I can't afford it ! I'm tired of all these big companies who are in bed with the people that run for office and get all these consessions and favors, promises and a blind eye turned - let the government US, hello !!) pick up the tab. I say, you play you pay. Why did they let Lehman Bros. go bankrupt. They didn't like them?

Who decides who gets the ride and who goes under? All these huge companies have 24-30 Boards of Directors who somehow come out of these failed companies rich.

I am ashamed, upset and frankly, worried about tomorrow in this Greedy country. A country spending my money and future on their rich buddies' failed businesses.

I say HOCKY, quit it, and I see why people stop paying taxes and get lost in the woods.

I am ashamed to be an American. I don't want either party to win. I don't believe in any of them or what they promise. These polititians all say what will get them elected.

I frankly do not believe any of them are honest, out for the good of us or can stop this speeding bullet train from crashing and killing all of us.

I am angry as hell and I'm not going to take it any more !!!!!!!

I feel the life being sucked out of me a penny at a time. The hell with this. At least Bill Clinton had a balanced budget until Bush came on the scene !

I can tell you this, one bank that I know of is concerned about a "run on their bank."

I think it's get what belongs to you or lose it today. What a difference 8 years has made. SAD !

life safari 09-19-08

2008-09-19T06:53:00.000-05:00

this little face pretty much sums up how I feel this morning. Lost, alone, scared and perplexed by the past few weeks.

Too much work, too much stress, Ike, gridlock on the streets and in need of a nice change of scenery. A vacation is, indeed, going to be in the planning stages for me. I think a nice pilgrimage to the Shrine of Our Lady of the Miraculous Medal in Perryville, Missouri is in order.

Today, I am only Grateful that it is Friday and I can be away from that job for 2 days
Thank YOU, Lord